Friday, August 27, 2010

3 year Diaversary

I do not think I can write much about this right now (other than the fact that I am at work), it is amazing how raw the emotions can still be.

Yes - I did have to step away from my desk before I lost it.

As any D-parent knows, the of diagnosois truely ROCKS your world. As much as diabetes is know second nature in our lives, it seems like yesterday that we heard those awful words: Grace has type 1 diabetes. When caring for a person with diabetes you can have the feeling of complete control one minute and whithin the same hour have no idea where that control went. They are tough emotions when it involves your child!

I have learned so much about diabetes, blood sugar, diet, nutrition, exercise, (etc, etc, etc) and how all of those things come together to affect Grace and her body, both emotionally and physically. But, even with all of the knowledge and practice in the world, a BS number of 295 or 350 pops on to the screen and **BOOM** back to square one. Curse all of the great mysteries of Diabetes.

I will end by saying that Grace - and all of the other T1's I have met - are AMAZING children and individuals. She is strong, confident, brave and will always be my sweet baby girl!

(Props to all the mom's and dad's out there taking care of these woderful kids! It take a D-Mom/Dad to truely understand!)

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Show me the numbers!

Well, we've moved on to the next step of the CGM study. We finally got the monitor/sensor. There's one catch - it's blinded for two weeks. All that we get to see are the actual BS tests. I can't wait to see the numbers.

I have such mixed emotions about this study and putting Grace through it. I know I've talked about it before, but now that she has this extra "thing" attached to her arm, it reminds me every time I look at her that she has this unfair, unforgiving, awful disease. We try very hard to teach Grace to NEVER be ashamed of having diabetes. Right now she is a confident little girl and does not know the concept of good or bad self-esteem. I want her to hold on to her confidence knowing that so many girls struggle with it as they get older. I am so excited about what we might learn about how her little body works with the CGM, but I don't want her to have any insecurity or embarrassment. I write this because she basically threw her monitor last night. Yes she was "HI", and I hope this CGM helps get rid of all of those highs that make her feel so lousy, but I hate to her so upset about diabetes. I know it's because I hate it too and wish I could take it all away. On the other side, today was a new day. Grace was excited about the new case, belt and was showing her friend M her new meter. I'm so proud of her and really hope that after the two week blind study, we are picked for full study. I really don't want to wait another six months to get the CGM. As crazy as they can make us, I really want to see the numbers.

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Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Cobra - Oy Vey :(

A little background - My Husband recently changed jobs. His last day of work was June 30th. Because of the "pre-existing" condition (Grace's diabetes - a whole other blog), we have elected to continue coverage for her until we find the best available option. The best option might not come until September or October with the (unknown) changes coming to healthcare. Again, a whole other blog.

We received all of the paperwork was in July. It stated that we had until September 3rd to decide who will continue what coverage. So, me thinking I was on the ball, filled out all of the paperwork within a week & mailed payment for July & August. I never thought there would be any problem - I still had a month and a half until the deadline. Boy was I wrong. Sometimes nothing is easy. Grace's regular coverage ended on June 26. So when I tried to go fill a prescription at the end of July, it said that she no longer had insurance. WHAT??? I thought the transition was going smoothly & we would not have any problems getting her supplies.

So, long story short, after many phone calls to Medco (prescription plan), UHC (health plan), and Payflex (Cobra plan), I found out that the cost of the prescription coverage went up about $72. This meant that she had coverage in July with no lapse, but because it was Aug. 4th, we still had a small balance due and the enrollment paperwork had not been forwarded to Medco.

Oy Vey. It is now Aug. 19 and it looks like I will be able to fill a precription on Monday or Tuesday. Keep your fingers crossed for me. I HATE getting so low on her supplies. I am thankful that I stocked up before all of this happened. I am down to nothing. I don't know why it makes me so nervous, but it's like the feeling you get when your gas light comes on and you are still 10+ mile away from a gas station.

Next week, I am going to fill everything - pen needles, syringes, insulin (Novo. & Lantus)etc, etc., etc. Then wether I need it our not the day I am able to fill everything again, I am going to do it. Stock up while I can. What a headache this has given me.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Why I cried today . . .

- Grace starts kindergarten in one week.

- Grace has diabetes

- Diabetes sucks

- never dreamt 504 plans, health care action plans and quick reference sheets would be part of getting ready for kindergarten

- I have to trust a whole new bunch of people to care for my baby girl & hope they can take as good care of her as her daycare/preschool has

- The vet thought Chloe (my dog) had cancer (good news here, things are fine, just an infection.

- I packed up my one year olds old winter clothes to give away = both my girls are growing up so fast.

- Oh Yeah - diabetes sucks

I feel better now. I'm ready for a new day. Tomorrow will be a good one!